Battles and Hot Chocolate



The past few weeks have been a little challenging. There are times when marriages thrive. There are times when you are on the same page with your spouse and you feel like you can conquer the world together. Those times are wonderful and are to be cherished.

And then there are those times when you just don't seem to click. Your sin and their sin collide in a seemingly perfect timed crescendo and all hell breaks loose. The battle for control rages on and both parties end up loosing terribly.

Unfortunately, the past couple of days we have seemed to fall in the latter category. We have failed at loving each other. We are so different in many ways, and we have used those differences as ammunition instead of using them to better each other.

It is pretty clear how badly we need Christ, for both of us individually and for our marriage. It is pretty clear that we need Him to be at the center of every fiber in our relationship.  It is also pretty clear how screwed up things get when He is not.

Then, when the days of "battle" have subsided, when the ammunition is put away and the white flag is finally waved, we can both see clearly again. We can see that we have always been wearing the same uniform and have always been on the same side. Forgiveness is asked for and received and it is an amazing thing.
God is faithful always. He is good even when we don't feel it. He always redeems what is broken.
If you are in a battle with your spouse, or any loved one really, you CAN wave the white flag. Not by your own doing. We aren't capable on our own- it has to be with the help of our Lord and Savior. He is our rescuer and our shield. And if you are like me, you need regular rescuing from yourself more than anything.

The original purpose of this entry was to post some pictures of the trip Jonathan and I took to Mt. Spokane today...but I hope my rambling is able to encourage someone. If nothing else, it lets others know that they aren't alone in their crazy.

So yea- today we found snow at Mt Spokane. We made hot chocolate and sat in the back of the Subaru. It was so awesome. And cold.  Here are some pictures.

Until next time friends!











 

Colville National Forrest




This morning Jonathan and I decided to plan a spontaneous trip west to explore.  We decided to visit Coville National Park, which is about two hours from Spokane. We went off-roading to get to the peak, but they closed the road about 14 miles in. I kept asking Jonathan, "Are you sure people take their cars up here??' because it kind of got intense at some parts. We ended up passing several other trucks...I guess that's the beauty of all wheel drive! Things really got interesting when we got a flat tire by what we think was a sharp rock. We had to drive down extremely slow until we got on the main gravel road to put on the spare. It's not truly adventure until something goes wrong I guess! We were able to get the tire patched  in a cute, little town called Chewelah. We then enjoyed lunch at a local mexican restaurant. Pretty fun actually!

On the drive, we could not get over the colors of the leaves! The contrast of the deep greens and bright yellows were truly breath taking.

Here are some pictures from today. Until next time friends. Enjoy the rest of your weekends!

We are The Church




Hello good friends-

The weather is getting cooler and fall is definitely upon us here in Spokane. I was talking with a friend the other day about our "friends giving" (we won't be able to come home for Thanksgiving, so we will be spending it with our friends here). I had the idea of having part of it outside to give us more room and she kindly reminded that this is Washington and there may be snow on the ground by then. I cringe. So long warm SC, holiday weather!

Moving on. I wanted to give you all an update on how we have been doing lately. Per usual, the Lord has been working and teaching us so much in various areas of our lives.

For the past month, Jonathan had been working the night shift at Hotel RL downtown. He would usually work from 2pm-11pm or after, and I would work from 8:30am-5:30pm. This put us on completely opposite schedules and we only saw each other on my hour lunch break and then on random afternoons he had off. During this time, I felt myself slip into a gradual depression. I missed Jonathan terribly and everything that was familiar. I felt so alone and coming home to an empty house sure did not help. Good thing Buddy was here. That sweet guy has seen a lot of tears.

I'll just be honest- I think we both had high doubts about moving at this point. "God, why the heck did you move us here.....for this??" "What is the purpose of going through these things?? "Did we miss something??" These were just some of the questions I asked almost every day (the nice, edited versions...). It felt like we were brought to our knees daily, and in those moments all we could do is look up, and with faint hearts whisper,  "God show me what you want me to learn thought this."

During this time, Jonathan and I grew so much closer to each other even though we hardly got to see each other. We realized how much we took for granted the time we had to spend with each other and made the most of every moment we were gifted.

Life was hard. But the Lord is always so incredibly faithful to give us the strength we need to get through, and to gift us with what we need most- more of Himself.

A few weeks ago, we were absolutely blown away.....AGAIN.... by the plan that God had for our move here. After church one Sunday, we were approached by our senior pastor with an opportunity for Jonathan to join the staff at Redemption as his assistant. After praying and being in almost complete unbelief at the opportunity, he accepted the position! And, even though it was Jonathan who got the position obviously, we believe that both of us accepted the responsibility and privilege of working along side the local church as a team for the advancement of the Kingdom. We are so thankful for having the opportunity to serve on the greeting and worship team. What a joyous privilege it is! We cannot contain our excitement to be joining Redemption in the Lord's work in Spokane, and using our gifts in anyway we can to help it grow and reach people for the gospel. We feel extremely humbled and blessed to be a part of Redemption, and we have made some incredible friendships within the body already!

To all of our friends and family back home- we cannot thank you enough for all of your prayers and the support you've given us on this journey. We wouldn't be here without you guys! Even though we are completely across the country, we are all The Church and we all have the same goal and mission.


-Love people well. Make disciples. Advance the Kingdom. Glorify the Father-


To our new friends and family here-we are excited to be coming alongside of you in this mission. We are here to partner with you in the mission set before us. We love you and look forward to doing life with you.

Well, I think that's all I have for this update.

Oh yea just a few more little side notes- I had to take out my dreads since I am working in the medical field. It only took about 15 hours total (in increments of course) to get all of them out. It was super bitter sweet. Oh and last weekend Jonathan stepped on a baby rattlesnake while we were hiking. He didn't get bit. He is fine. But we can now say that we are officially hardcore PNW-erns. I don't think that's a word but I just made it up.

Until next time friends! 

Settling In





Hi friends!

Just me again. I'm currently writing this at our recently found kitchen table. With stains and chipped paint, it was the perfect thrift find for our little apartment.

 It is a beautiful day in Spokane. The sun has been shining, the windows are open, and the temperature is a delightful 74 degrees with zero humidity (had to rub that one in a little bit for all my SC people). I wanted to give you all an update on how things are going in the Evergreen State. This Friday marks three weeks that we have been here. The apartment is pretty much finished now, with the exception of a few more decorating things I want to do,  which is a huge relief. We were able to get probably upwards of 90% of all of our furniture and household things from thrift shops which is awesome. I love the character it adds, finding things that do not to match exactly. Our favorite place to go thirfting so far is a place called Tossed and Found. It is an awesome little shop that has staff members go out to find inventory every week, so you know there are constantly new things coming in to go look at.

We have been welcomed into an amazing church family here with Redemption Spokane. Jonathan has been in contact with their pastor, Miles, since before we moved and we have felt nothing but love and acceptance from the moment (and even before) we arrived to Spokane. Jonathan has become friends with the worship leader and actually played the drums this past Sunday! We are so excited and thankful to have found a church home and cannot wait to begin building new relationships with people.  We have attended Redemption only three times now and it already feels like home. Last Thursday evening we enjoyed going to a training session at Redemption on Humility in Leadership, given by Dave Harvey with Sojourn Network (a network for church planting churches). It has been so great being able to jump right in!

On the job front- I am extremely excited to say that as of last Friday I got a new job! I will be working as a full time receptionist at a family medical clinic here called Rockwood. Orientation starts on July 25! This was completely the Lord's doing. To make a long story short- the first week we were here, we met one of the owners at Tossed and Found while looking for things for the apartment. Through our conversation, we learned that her husband is a pastor in town. We told her why we moved and that we were looking for jobs. She told me that she knew of someone who had an office admin position open, and I told her that was exactly what I was looking for. She gave me the number of the lady who is the manager at the clinic, so I called, and two days later I had a interview. A week later, I was offered the job and said manager is now my boss...who is super nice and awesome! I am a little nervous for sure, but I am fully confident that the Lord will equip me to do this job, just like He has done with so many other things in the past. Jonathan has gone to several recommended coffee shops in the area. Please continue to pray that he will find something soon. We are confident that He will provide!  He has blown us away with His favor, provision, and faithfulness.

During these past few weeks, our marriage has grown tremendously. Leading up to our move, we were not as connected as I'd hoped we would be. Things were hard, and it seemed much easier to internalize what we were preparing for instead of opening ourselves up to each other, adding yet another layer of vulnerability to what we were already feeling. I have to say that Jonathan was much better at this then I was. I can be extremely prideful sometimes in an effort to hide my vulnerability and what is really happening in the depths of my heart. ANYWAY.

With the extra time we have had recently, we have spent so much quality time together. Not the quality time that normally would entail eating dinner in the living room while watching The Office (which is still so great by the way). I mean the quality time where we sit in the quiet of the morning in our little apartment, praying with and for each other, crying with each other, and really being vulnerable and honest with each other. We really have had to rely on each other more. This move has stripped us from everything familiar and comfortable, and there is such a rawness that we feel daily. It kind of reminds me of a hard reset you have to do with your phone occasionally when it starts acting dysfunctional. Sometimes it needs a good reset to get things back on track and working properly.  Back home we had some dysfunction in our marriage, and this move has been the reset button. That push was painful, but has been so incredibly worth it.

There has been some slight lifestyle adjustments we've had to learn since being here, too. We have realized that the area that we live in has a very high theft rate. We have had a few things stolen, and have learned that we just need to be more cognoscente with our belongings.  I will admit, my first reaction to having our things taken was anger and frustration. I didn't feel compassion for the people who took our things, I felt resentment and an urge to shut everyone around me out. I didn't want to show those around me Jesus, and my heart quickly went to judgement instead of compassion. However, the Lord never fails to continue showing me where I need to grow and is slowly changing my heart. Jonathan and I have started praying for wisdom in how we can be a light for Jesus in our community. We aren't exactly sure what that will look like yet, but are confident that the Lord will make it clear in time.  We can definitely feel a brokenness over this city in many ways, and want to be used in anyways we can to offer the amazing hope in Christ that we have.

Buddy is eating up the fact that he is the main source of our attention. Anytime we go out with him, he loves to work those pathetic puppy eyes to get extra attention. He has completely mastered it and it is absolutely ridiculous.

As much as we miss home sometimes, we know this is where the Lord wants us and we are so excited to see what all He has in store for us here!

Well friends, I think that is all for now. Sorry it has taken me a bit to post an update.

Until next time!

<3

Birds, Boats, and More




 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? - Matthew 6:26


Hi friends!

So these little babies are in a nest right outside my office window. It has been so cool to watch mommy and daddy bird build this nest and now take care of their little ones. In this season of so many unknowns, it has been such a sweet reminder of the Lord's provision. He sees their needs and feeds them. If the Lord sees these little creatures, how much more does He see and take care of us, the very creatures He has made in His own image?

It has been kind of difficult to get around to everyone who has been asking about how our visit to Spokane went. So many people have been praying or us and it is so very appreciated! So if you are wanting to hear about our trip...keep reading! If not...feel free to close the window. I'll never know ;)    

I am just going to start off by saying that I was super nervous about visiting our soon to be home. I seems like I randomly get hit with the reality that we aren't just talking about this neat sounding idea anymore. I ugly cried when I told my mom and brother goodbye on our way to the airport. This is really happening.

 I was nervous that I would hate it. That it wouldn't feel like home. That it really wouldn't be as beautiful and awesome as everyone (myself included) kept telling me that it would be. I was right and wrong about each of those feelings.

 We had 3 connecting flights- Greenville, Atlanta, Seattle, and then to Spokane. I am so thankful that the Lord gave us smooth travels there with no missed flights or lost luggage. We arrived in Spokane at about 2pm or so and then checked into our hotel. We dropped off our bags and went to grab lunch at Panera Bread. I think at this point reality hit both of us again and we were unsure on how to deal with what we were feeling. I don't think either one of us has ever had to deal with that type of emotion before, and I cannot exactly put into words what those emotions felt like. Expect for the fact that I was super self conscious of my southern accent. I guess that's good enough explanation for now.

 Despite all of the weird feels, we spent the rest of the afternoon exploring Coeur d'Alene. It is such a beautiful lake town 30 minutes away from Spokane right over the border into Idaho. Best part? It was like 85 degrees outside.....with ZERO humidity. Is that even a thing??? It is in the PNW (that's what the cool kids call the Pacific North West. You've been warned) and it is seriously the best! We didn't sweat at all and we were wearing jeans and t-shirts. We had all intentions of eating outside at a nice restaurant...but thanks to bad stomach cramps I had been having all day, we called it a day, picked up dinner, and ate in our hotel room.

 The next day Jonathan had meetings at Moody. We got the typical campus tour and had great conversations with the guy on staff about the area. The Moody campus in Spokane actually shares a building with a large church in town. Pretty cool I thought...after the initial confusion when the GPS brought us into the parking of some random church parking lot. When we had our meeting with the financial aid department, that is when things got interesting. It was in that meeting that we learned that we made too much last year (I am still so incredibly baffled by this...) and that we do not qualify for any financial aid. After learning the amount that we would have pay per month, we were both left pretty defeated and frustrated.

 How could this happen? There was no way we could swing it financially. Why would God bring us this far and allow this news?

 After the meeting we got lunch before my interview. I changed into my big girl clothes in the bathroom of Qdoba. Looking back now that was pretty hilarious and I am super glad that they had an abnormally nice bathroom. My interview went great but the position needed to be filled before we moved of course, which I had already kind of expected. Good news is- the lady who did my interview said that she does not think that it will be very difficult for me to find a job once we move with my experience.

 Jonathan picked me up afterwards and we went straight back to the hotel. My mind was obviously distracted at the interview, but Jonathan had time to process the ugly fact that we could not afford for him to go to Moody full time all things remaining the same. My heart ached seeing my husband hit a low I haven't witnessed in a long time, and feeling like I had no words to make the situation any less heavy. By this time it was about 4:50. We had our next meeting to look at an apartment at 5:15. Just for kicks, we figured that we would go look at it anyway, not really believing that it would lead to anything given the news we were given just hours before.

 We got to the apartment and met the couple who had been renting the apartment, both recently graduating from Moody. We instantly clicked. I could go down a list of at least 10 things in common we had with them, but for the sake of this post already being a novel, I will refrain from listing all of them (you're welcome).  We had the best conversations from our philosophies of ministry and business, to what I believe was a God sent conversation about the will of God.

 Through this conversation we were reminded that the will of God is not an answer to a question. It is not some secret you have to discover. It is not something that you can somehow miss or screw up. The will of God is a lifestyle that you live out. If you are seeking Him wholeheartedly, that IS His will. Can we just pause for a moment and embrace the freedom in that statement??

 Those hours we spent with Aaron and Allison shifted the feelings from defeat to determination for us. No longer were we asking, “God why would you allow this to happen?” but “OK, God. Regardless of this bump we are going to keep moving forward in this direction you’ve pointed us in.”

 Jonathan and I know that our move to Spokane is so much more than just him taking classes at Moody. No matter what happens, whether that means taking classes at Moody full time, part time, or even at another college in town...It is more about us walking in obedience to our Father. Continuing to move forward until we sense Him moving us elsewhere. The message that Pastor David gave last week confirmed this even more. We can allow the fear of the unknown to paralyze us. It can cause us to slam on the brakes and bow out before the Lord is finished working. We don’t have all of our questions answered. We don’t have a map planned out with every detail marked.

And we are finally coming to place where we are OK with that.  

 “Sounds pretty reckless if you ask me,  Amber.”

 Um YEA! Tell me about it!

 Up until this season in my life, following Jesus has been comfortable. Obviously my flesh and sin are always causing me to fall over and over again, but let’s be honest….I fall over and over again in the security that my life offered in that moment. Now, following Jesus is not just what I say or think in my head. Following Him in this season means putting action to our beliefs about Him, and jumping out of the boat. Jumping into those raging waters of the unknown, and clinging to Him with everything.

 Side note- please don’t hear me say that you have to move clear across the US to “jump out of the boat”. Your jumping out of the boat may be you asking the Lord to give you the courage to speak up in a conversation, or loving/respecting your spouse when they don’t deserve it, or maybe even forgiving someone for the 7th time they’ve hurt you. And you know what….those small acts of obedience are just as important to the Lord as the seemingly “big” ones.

 So yea. That is about it for now I think. Our trip was great!  We had a great time. Met lots of awesome people. Pretty sure we found an apartment. Explored some of the area.

We still have some unknowns.  We are still moving forward. We are still jumping out of the boat.

 And we are much, much more valuable than little birds.

What ARE we doing??





So our newest adventure is moving across the country to Washington State. Why in the world are we making such a move?? Here is a little piece of our story, from a few different angles.

Factually.
About a year and a half ago, Jonathan began the process of applying to Moody Bible Institute. We went to Chicago to visit the area and see what living there would be like. After falling in love with the city and entertaining the thought of moving there, we got the news that his application was denied due to his previous grades. Coming home extremely frustrated, Jonathan then began the process of writing his appeal essay. After waiting for what seemed to be forever, we got the news that they had accepted his appeal and granted him ability to take classes online through their Distance Learning program to basically prove that he could do the work and do well. After doing extremely well in his two classes online (Old and New Testament), Jonathan made the call to see if he could now transfer in. After what seemed to be a painfully long waiting period (again...do you see a pattern here??), we got the news that he had been accepted to the Spokane campus. Excited and terrified, we told our families over Christmas and friends a few weeks later. As of now, Jonathan will go in as a Biblical studies major with an emphasis in missions. We both know this is our next step in training and preparation for ministry and whatever else the Lord has for both of us. We work as such a team and really feel like the Lord is going to use our gifts and abilities together for His glory. It is a beautiful thing that I know I don't thank Jesus for enough.

Emotionally.
At the end of January, we pretty much sold everything we had and moved in with friends family to save money until we make our move the last week in June. My initial way of coping was to ignore what was happening. That worked up until we didn't have a house to call our own and the things we did decide to keep were stored in boxes. It worked until the realities set in of what we are leaving, which seems like everything (jobs, friends, our church home, family, security....) and what we are going to....which seems like nothing. Well, except for each other and beautiful mountains of course.

Side note- Spokane is not the same as Seattle. Contrary to popular belief- it does not rain all the time in Spokane. However, we do appreciate the reoccurring advice to pack rain boots and umbrellas. Moving on...

Being real...I still... 2 months away from moving, ask myself why in the heck we are doing this. I still fear the unknown and long to stay in the comforts of Greenwood. I fear not being able to find a church home like the one we have now. Our church family is such a huge part of our lives, and it is hard to imagine what it will be like without it. I fear hating my new job. I fear not being able to find a place to stay or not being able to take our dog (for those who know me....you know this is a big one). When I think about just a few of these fears on my long list, I can't help but go back to the fact that I fear disobeying my Father above all. To stay would be much worse than leaving all of these wonderful things behind in obedience. I know in my head all the truths the Lord has set before me. Truths that He will prosper us and that He will provide for us. That He is for us and that this time is needed to grow us more into His image.  I can know all of these things all day long and still struggle to believe them in my heart. That is one of my goals in this season, to really believe His truths so deep down that no amount of doubt or fear can them snatch away.

These last few months both Jonathan and I have had to do some major dying to self. Dying to our time, our space, our schedules, our feelings of certainty and security. It has completely stripped us of any entitlement we ever had it seems like haha. I have to laugh thinking about it to keep from crying. No, but for real though. It has been so hard!

But you know, it will all be worth it.

These lessons could not have been learned any other way I don't think. And these lessons are needing to be learned for a reason that we will hopefully see one day.

Jonathan and I have already grown so much closer together. He is the most important person in my life, and I am thrilled that I get to love and support him on this new journey.

Well that is all I have for now- a little glimpse into our story and some lessons I'm trying to stumble through. I hope none of you were expecting some thought provoking, profound wisdom in this post. I don't claim to be a perfect writer with impressive vocabulary! Can you imagine me being like that in real life?? HA!

Until next time friends.

Dreads


Here are some pictures of my dread journey!
A sweet friend of mine is helping me get them started. I am using the twist and rip method. It takes a lot longer for them to lock up and mature, but this method is one that does the least amount of damage.  I am sure some of you are thinking, "Well she is going to end up having to cut all of her hair off and look like a boy eventually. That's unfortunate..."  Thankfully, if I ever decide I want to get rid of them, I will not have to cut all of my hair off and look like a boy. I can just brush them out! I have always been super basic with my hair until now. Here is to lots of patience and learning!  


 Week 1 
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